Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

3 Popcorn Kernels

"Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End" is a perfect example of why cinematic setting is of the utmost importance.

Although this third and (not likely) final installment of the "Pirates" trilogy serves up hearty thrills and eye-popping special effects, it is too convoluted and plot heavy to really penetrate an audience.

The result is an empty summer blockbuster that will probably make far more money than it actually has any right to.

The movie picks up where the trilogy's second installment "Dead Man's Chest" left off. Johnny Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow is somewhere between the lands of the living and the dead, also known as Davy Jones' Locker.

Elizabeth Swann (Kiera Knightley), Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) set out to rescue their friendly foe to restore peace among the Pirate Lords.

Once their mission is complete, the team meets with the other Pirate Lords to develop a plan to defeat Davy Jones (Bill Nighy) who is now under the control of an abusive government. Their plan is not well-received so, of course, a fair dose of treachery, lies and deceit is offered up -- adding to the overall confusion.

This all leads to the final showdown between Sparrow and Jones. Their sword fight is set on the high seas during a storm of Calypso's creation.

Meanwhile, Elizabeth, Will and Captain Barbossa carry on with battles of their own, against fishy soldiers and other villains.

Fans of the franchise certainly will be entertained but they will not necessarily know what is going on. Moviegoers of all ages will become bored by the talky second act -- it feels like an eternity for the action to finally pick back up.

When that action does hit, there is no definite sense of place and it is hard to identify the good guys from the bad guys. Therefore, the visuals deliver but the emotion is absent making for a fun yet forgettable ride.

Depp is still a joy to watch and Rush's return is a leap in the right direction. However, Knightly and Bloom have little to do in "At World's End." Their one big scene together comes across as corny rather than romantic.

As usual, the supporting characters steal each scene. Whether it is that strange pirate with the fake eyeball or a monkey also named Jack, these people make the movie bearable. Even Keith Richards' brief appearance as Captain Jack's father is amusing, despite being ultimately pointless.

Disney simply tried too hard with "At World's End." As is the case with a number of the 2007 summer flicks, the filmmakers injected too much into one movie. The nearly three-hour running time of this latest "Pirates" movie reflects a false sense of self-importance.

Staying after the closing credits gives you the opportunity to see a hidden scene which may be a tease of the next installment, which has yet to be confirmed. Depp has expressed interest in reprising his role so the box office receipts will probably be the determining factor.

None of the "Pirates" movies were really as fantastic as some people lead themselves to believe, but this latest attempt does nothing more than walk the plank.

Still, I doubt many moviegoers will be able to resist the urge to see "At World's End."

Bug

3 1/2 Popcorn Kernels

Billed as a horror, "Bug" may leave fans of the genre scratching their heads. Then again, there is not a moviegoer out there who can confidently say they know what the truth is behind this feature film.

"Bug" is filled with blood and torture but it is ultimately a psychological thriller. Whether or not there are in fact bugs is the central idea here.

"Bug" stars Ashley Judd as Agnes White, a lonely woman who meets an unusual character named Peter Evans, portrayed by Michael Shannon.

The two get to know each other and make it adamantly clear that neither one wants a significant other in their life. Instead, they form a friendly bond in which they share emotions and, eventually, secrets.

Agnes' ex-boyfriend Jerry Goss (Harry Connick Jr.) enters the frame and we begin to think Peter will be Agnes' knight in shining armor. He comforts her and their friendship leads to something more -- including an oddly slimy fit of love making.

Before morning, Peter wakes up and shows Agnes a rash of bug bites on his wrist. He shuffles through the sheets to find the perpetrating "aphid" but Agnes cannot seem to see it at first. She hardly cares about this, either.

Soon, Agnes begins seeing the insects and the duo determine the apartment is crawling with them. In fact, Peter claims they are in his blood, care of an egg sack implanted in a cavity in his tooth by army researchers.

However, doctors cannot see the bugs and neither can Agnes' friend. Paranoia sets in within Peter and Agnes hops aboard for the dangerous ride.

Based on a play, "Bug" probably works much better on stage than on screen. However, director William Friedkin does an excellent job at instilling terror in the audience.

A number of elements fail to add up and appear to be nothing more than extra pieces to the puzzle, but the movie keeps you guessing while cringing and turning away from the bloody action.

"Bug" is a better character study and exercise in acting than it is a plot-based flick. Judd and Shannon are spectacular and carry the film from start to finish.

It feels like a waste of time but "Bug" will work its way under your skin and leave you feeling strangely satisfied -- if not a little itchy.

Waitress

4 Popcorn Kernels

"Waitress" is an awfully feminist flick but the humor will have both genders hungry for more.

The movie is sweet enough to satisfy the cravings of most audiences, although the ending will work the nerves of some -- especially men.

Fortunately, the talented cast of actors, including Keri Russell, Nathan Fillion, Andy Griffith and Cheryl Hines, are highly entertaining and make the loose ends less noticeable.

Russell plays Jenna, a country girl working as a waitress at a pie shop owned by a man named Joe (Griffith). Jenna is stuck in the middle of an emotionally abusive marriage.

Things get worse when she discovers she is pregnant. She wants to keep her job so she can earn enough money to enter a pie competition. Jenna constantly thinks up new pie recipes with unique names to match her mood or circumstance.

Then she meets her new doctor Dr. Pomatter (Fillion) and his kindness wins her over. They forge a bond and begin cheating on their respective significant others. Jenna is torn over the ethics of her behavior and finds herself critiquing her friends for doing the same things she is doing.

Jenna's confidence is low and her husband only makes it lower. He forces her to promise she will not love her baby more than she loves him. This is an easy task for Jenna, who despises her husband and does not want to have a baby.

Joe and Dr. Pomatter tell Jenna she is better than that, though, and try to convince her to take steps to improve her life.

"Waitress" is fun, cute and almost too positive. Despite being squeaky clean, the movie succeeds in winning over moviegoers' hearts through optimism, quirky characters and a catchy song about pies.

Writer/director Adrienne Shelly is far from being professionally skilled, but she apparently knows how to please an audience. Again, women are likely to favor "Waitress" more than men, but the movie provides enough universal entertainment for everyone.

It is the kind of movie you can bring your girlfriend to and score huge points. Even better, bring your mother and make up for forgetting Mother's Day a few weeks ago.

"Waitress" is an improvement over other feminist flicks (can any guy forget "The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood?") and serves up warm, chewy goodness. Even the crust is tasty!

Popcorn Picks 2006

I usually struggle to develop a list of the best 10 movies of the year. I always come up with 14 movies or more and have a difficult time cutting a few off the list.

However, this year, I found the perfect 10. These movies stand out above the rest as the best -- and must see -- motion pictures of 2006.

There is something for everyone on this year's list -- a family film about a beloved best friend, two comedies with the dirtiest humor to date, an eerie tale of preventative revenge and two excruciatingly disturbing features about the end of civilization.

10. "Lassie" -- This reincarnation of the tale about a boy and his dog is heartbreaking and uplifting. Anyone who has ever had a pet can relate to the characters in this beautifully shot family film.

9. "Down in the Valley" -- Edward Norton is remarkable in this independent film about a forbidden romance. Engaging and oftentimes thrilling, this motion picture is quietly absorbing.

8. "Children of Men" -- Set in the not-so-distant future, this movie about the pending end of the human race is hard to watch and highly depressing. However, a number of single-shot, uncut sequences make this feature film simply outstanding.

7. "Apocalypto" -- Mel Gibson's bloody narrative about the end of an ancient civilization is also hard to watch but its fast pace warrants your attention. This movie is nothing short of compelling.

6. "Hard Candy" -- In a time when tales of pedophilia is a daily segment on the local news, this movie about predator versus prey is gripping. Good luck trying to choose sides, though; it is harder than you think.

5. "Borat" -- Sacha Baron Cohen knows how to make Americans laugh. He also knows how to make them think. Then again, he knows how to make other cultures quite angry, too.

4. "Babel" -- Speaking of cultures, this movie's narrative layers that connect in one way or another are each extremely entertaining. Not only does Brad Pitt give his greatest performance in his career, but the entire motion picture is the most important piece of cinema of 2006.

3. "Little Miss Sunshine" -- It is no secret that this feature film delivers many laughs. It tells the story of a family to which we can all relate and, for that, you leave the theater feeling uplifted.

2. "Clerks 2" -- Some claim Kevin Smith's sequel about interspecies erotica and inappropriate nicknames is garbage. I say, I would happily go dumpster diving to laugh this hard.

1. "A Prairie Home Companion" -- Big-name actors. Stunning set pieces. Folk music. This is what going to the movies is all about.

How to Eat Fried Worms Cooks Up Family Fun

     Walden Media has the perfect recipe for a family flick in How to Eat Fried Worms. The movie, based on the children’s book by the same title, revolves around a young boy who arrives at a new school only to be duped into a bet with the school bully. He must now spend his Saturday eating disgusting, creepy crawlers. School age kids will be enthralled with this motion picture, which features a few bright spots for adults as well. It is short, harmless and surprisingly fresh cinematic fare that the whole family can enjoy.

Turbulent Snakes on a Plane Ridiculously Fun

     The only movie with a sillier title than Snakes on a Plane is the upcoming Let’s Go to Prison. The movie, which stars Samuel L. Jackson and has developed quite the Internet following, takes the inane storyline of an action star releasing a plethora of poisonous snakes on a jetliner to kill a witness who is going to testify against him. Many of the snakes are absurdly fake in appearance but there the feature will certainly entertain moviegoers. It’s good for a laugh and even better for a thrill.

Accepted Rejected

     Justin Long of Jeepers Creepers and TV’s Ed fame is the only highlight of an otherwise average motion picture in Accepted. The movie is about a high school graduate played by Long, who gets rejected by every college to which he applies. He leases a vacant building and accepts himself into a fake university but technology goes awry and numerous other students get accepted, too. Unfortunately, most of the jokes fall flat as a result of the flick’s lack of logic.

Material Girls Has No Heart

     Hilary Duff stars alongside her sister Haley Duff in Material Girls, a decent effort at a chick flick with very little true substance. The plot revolves around the sisters in the roles of close-to-real-life characters, heiresses to the Marchetta cosmetics company, dealing with the downfall of their father’s beloved business. It has a significant lack of laughs or any applicable life moral but it remains a suitable choice for mothers and daughters who wish to spend a little cinematic time with one another.

Step Up Stage Too Full

     Step Up would have been a very good movie had it not tried so hard. There are various storylines added to the mix that don’t add anything other than a few extra minutes to the movie. The movie tries its hardest to be more important that it actually is but it looks just like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Step Up is fun and it should have settled for that. If it did, moviegoers would have been in for a real treat.

     Instead, Step Up is an example of adding too many characters to an already full feature film. It is a decent romance with some great music but the inclusion of these minor characters that have nothing to do one minute and come center stage the next make the movie feel too crowded for its own good. Regardless, it is worth a look if only for the star-making performance by Jenna Dewan.

     Dewan stars as Nora, a student at a school for the arts. When Tyler, played by Channing Tatum, breaks into the school with a couple of his friends he is ordered to community service within the school as part of the cleaning staff. One day while watching Nora struggle to find a substitute partner for her showcase dance routine, Tyler offers his services to her and impresses her with his different-but-adequate dancing abilities.

     Tyler’s newfound interest angers his friends who notice his absence in their clique. Tyler struggles with his desire to make something of himself and his budding attraction to Nora. When Nora’s old partner returns, Tyler is placed on the sidelines and it looks like his dreams of dancing must dissipate and his romance with the wealthy Nora will fade away with it.

     Step Up is an entertaining motion picture with some very strong performances. Dewan, who starred in this year’s surprise horror hit Tamara, continues her on-screen appeal and promises to go far in the entertainment industry. The music will have you on your feet and the romance is sure to steam up your glasses but the subplots will leave you, at least somewhat, with two left feet.

Pulse Has A Faulty Modem

     Horror movies should not be rated (PG-13). In not aiming for an (R) rating, filmmakers not only hold back the scares and make the horror flick less interesting but they are also responsible for inviting kids and teens to act incredibly immature. Case in point: While watching Pulse I had to listen to faux-screaming from a group of teen moviegoers. I suppose that is wasn’t their fault, though, that Pulse was funnier than it was scary.

     That is probably why the release date for Pulse was pushed back a few months. Originally slated for release in the middle of the summer, the studio decided to hold off on the flick until the dog days between summer and fall – a typical timeframe for bombs. There are no legitimate moments of fright in Pulse, only ridiculously cheesy moments worthy of hearty laughter.

     Pulse stars Kristen Bell as Mattie, a college student trying to contact her missing boyfriend Josh. When she finally locates him he kills himself. It is soon discovered that there is a epidemic of such suicidal behavior around the world. Mattie’s friends begin disappearing one by one so she tracks down the guy that bought Josh’s computer for clues.

     This guy is Dexter, played by Ian Somerhalder, and he shows Mattie a freaky video that automatically plays on Josh’s old computer. They come to the conclusion that ghosts are being transmitted through the various communication signals looking for lives to steal. They must decide between fleeing to a dead zone to escape the terror or try to eliminate the deadly computer virus unleashed by Josh.

     Pulse is a step up from other recent attempts at ghost stories like The Ring and The Grudge but other horror movies like Saw and Hostel flatten everything that Pulse tries. The acting in the movie is despicable and the peculiar ending will leave even the most hardcore horror fans shrugging their shoulders. Pulse has the right style – dialing in the perfect cinematography and scary set-ups – but there is no payoff to this technical bore.